In three-n of my countless diaries, I have written about my recent disappointments and regrets using precise names, so I intend not to be explicitly disappointed here. Although I have been making excuses about the weather lately, the truth is I was afraid to take time to think quietly alone. That is why I haven't been running much, and perhaps I just wanted to keep someone sitting in front of me. Even though I didn't properly share the truly important things. When my partner asked how I was feeling today, I told them I was feeling much better—that I tried to think of what I might be afraid of, and found there was nothing at all. It was truly the truth, but it is not easy to deal with emotions once they have been crushed! I am not afraid of death now compared to when I seriously thought about killing myself every day. I am more at ease now than when I was making a decent amount of money. Try to give me a cliché and say it all depends on your mindset. Whether it is coding, assisting Yoosung, or picking blueberries at my parents' house, they all have one thing in common: if you keep doing them one by one, they eventually come to an end. In that sense, isn't life truly a continuous grind? Sometimes, when I forget that, I get suddenly irritated like a bolt of lightning, but I think about it again—stroll, stomp, stomp, stomp. I thought my own satisfaction was the most important thing, but I just want to get some positive feedback from the life I’ve built, at least once.